When Anxiety Feels Like It's Running the Show

If you’ve ever felt like anxiety is living in the background of your life—tight chest, constant overthinking, body hyper-aware of every sensation—you’re not alone. Anxiety isn’t just about feeling worried; sometimes, it’s a full-body experience: A tightness in your chest that won’t go away. A racing mind that jumps from one catastrophe to the next. The inability to just be—to float through life without that low-level hum of panic underneath it all.

Even when you know you’re okay logically, emotionally your body isn’t convinced. That’s one of the hardest parts—feeling like you should be able to shake it off, but your nervous system is stuck in overdrive. Maybe you’re carrying a lot—work, finances, family, responsibilities, the weight of other people depending on you—and your body is responding like you’re in constant crisis mode. Because, in a way, you kind of are.

Why Your Body Feels This Way

When you’re juggling big responsibilities, your nervous system registers it as ongoing stress. It’s not necessarily one big crisis; it’s constant micro-stressors stacking up, keeping your system on high alert. The result? You’re always braced for impact, even if nothing is actually wrong in the moment.

Your brain and body are wired for survival. When you have so much riding on you—whether it’s providing for a family, running a business, or just managing daily life—it’s natural for your body to be on edge. The problem is, it’s exhausting to live like this. And it makes it hard to be present, to engage with loved ones, or even just to clean the house without feeling like you’re carrying the weight of the world.

The Trap of Hyperawareness

One of the toughest parts? The way anxiety makes you hyper-focused on your body. A tight chest, a weird sensation, an off feeling—it all becomes magnified, triggering spirals of what if? Because when you already feel stretched thin, the idea of something being wrong with you feels unbearable. If you aren’t okay, then what happens to everything else?

What Helps (Besides Just “Calming Down”)

The frustrating thing about anxiety is that trying to force yourself to relax doesn’t usually work. Your body is too amped up. Instead of going straight from panic to peace, try meeting your body where it’s at first:

1. Move the Energy Before You Try to Relax

Your body might need to discharge the excess energy before it can settle. Some ways to do that:

• A fast-paced walk

• Shaking out your limbs (literally, just shaking off the tension)

• Dancing to one song, even if you don’t feel like it

• Tensing all your muscles for a few seconds, then releasing

If your nervous system is stuck in fight-or-flight, trying to go straight into relaxation is like slamming the brakes on a car going 90 mph. You need a middle step first.

2. Anchor Yourself in the Present with Sensory Grounding

Once you've burned off some of that extra energy, try something tactile:

• Dunk your hands in cold water

• Massage your feet or hands

• Hold a warm mug or wrap up in a heavy blanket

• Notice one small thing around you (the color of the sky, the feel of your sweater, the smell in the air)

Your body needs reminders that you’re safe right now.

3. Talk to Your Anxiety Like It’s a Scared Child

Instead of fighting the anxiety, try acknowledging it. When your body sends those panic signals—tight chest, urgency, racing thoughts—talk to it gently:“I see you. I know you’re freaked out. But we are safe right now.”Anxiety is trying to protect you, but it sometimes gets it wrong. You don’t have to battle it; you can soothe it instead.

You Don’t Have to Muscle Through This

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, know this: You are carrying a lot, and it makes sense that you feel this way. But you don’t have to white-knuckle your way through it. Your body wants to find its way back to calm. You’re not broken, and you don’t have to figure this out alone.

If nothing else, give yourself tiny moments of softness. You deserve them.

Post Written by Stephanie Pelland